What Brings Us Together: Imposter Syndrome
Alright friends – show of hands: who’s guilty of spending an UNREASONABLE amount of time questioning whether they’ve got the right to be going around calling themselves an entrepreneur, or giving advice to others? 🙋♀️
Looking around the virtual room you’d see a sea of hands; we all feel it. Even those of us with a bunch of letters behind our names, feel the fear of not actually knowing WTF we’re doing. Almost a decade ago, I remember the unhinging fear I felt meeting with my first clients and wondering “who am I to be telling anyone how to run their business”? I fought that negative self-talk for MANY years…and still do to this day.
For me, there’s a flush of heat that starts in my stomach then rises to my head. Remember that scene in Breaking Dawn, (yes – I’m referring to Twilight!!) where Bella’s numb from morphine but her body’s turning into a vampire? The camera flashes between her still body, and her inner torture? Yeah…that’s a good visual for how I feel when “Imposter Syndrome” strikes.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Well, assuredly we’ve all got some kind of psychosis ;) But here’s some more legit reasons:
Perfectionism: Ever feel that nothing you do is ever good enough? Perfectionists believe that they need to know everything and perform flawlessly to be considered “good enough.”
Was it Luck?: People with imposter syndrome often explain their success as luck or timing, rather than their own skill and effort. This undermines their achievements and fosters a fear of being "found out.”
Comparison with Others: Ooof…this one hits home. In our social media-driven world, it's easy to fall into the trap of comparing our behind-the-scenes struggles with others' highlight reels. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and the belief that everyone else is more qualified or capable.
High Expectations and Pressure: Especially in entrepreneurial environments, there's often high pressure to succeed. This can be internal (self-imposed expectations) or external (from peers, customers, or society). When people consistently achieve high standards, they might fear they can't maintain this level and will eventually be unmasked as imposters.
New Challenges and Roles: Entering a new role or taking on new challenges can trigger imposter syndrome. The unfamiliarity and learning curve can make even the most competent people doubt their abilities.
Then I started seeing people that were HUGE, talking about their imposter syndrome feelings. When Natalie Portman started at Harvard in ’99, she “felt like there had been some mistake, that I wasn’t smart enough to be in this company, and that every time I opened my mouth I would have to prove I wasn’t just a dumb actress.” WHAT?
This made me pause. How can people that are “obviously” so accomplished, doubt themselves? The truth of it is, we’re all human, and apparently imposter syndrome is a universal truth for all of us.
So how do we all get through this mental bashing? It’s all about mindset shifts, community, and hard work.
MINDSET
Of course, this needs to be the first thing we tackle. When you catch yourself thinking “I don’t belong here” or “I’m not good enough,” try replacing these thoughts with more realistic ones, like “I was given this opportunity because I’m capable,” or better yet “I worked my ass off for this and I deserve it!”
COMMUNITY
Misery does love company, doesn’t it? But I have to say, that talking about our imposter syndrome with friends and our fellow entrepreneurs can be truly therapeutic. You'll likely find that many others are just as insecure and uncertain as you are. Realizing this can normalize the experience and provide mutual support.
HARD WORK
Seriously? Well yes…cause sometimes our confidence can come from learning and preparation. So instead of hoping that others will cover for you in areas where you’re unsure, pull up your socks and learn enough to make you dangerous ;).
On cloud 9 one minute; feeling like a fraud the next. It’s a common experience, especially for creative, hard-working individuals. We all go through the roller coaster of it all, and I love me a day at Disney…embrace the ride. Every bout of doubt let’s you grow as an entrepreneur. So embrace it! Head over to our app community and share your imposter syndrome stories.